Wednesday, October 16, 2013

Crazy in the Backyard

Queenie went out of town for a couple of days and left me in charge of Crazy. The first night we went out and sat in the backyard. The evenings are getting cooler and even if they weren’t I think it was cooler outside than in my house. My air conditioner has gone out. I have decided to tough it out till next summer or until it gets so hot that I’m miserable, which will probably be March. I poured myself a glass of wine. I opted for the good stuff; you know the kind that comes out of a bottle as opposed to the boxed wine also known as the never ending adult juice box. I sat down at the yard table, turned on my music and took a sip of wine thinking this would be a relaxing night. Crazy had other ideas. My yard is not completely fenced in, so Queenie bought a wireless electric fence for dogs. She trained Crazy in a couple of days. Overall he is a good dog, his only fault is that he is a BIG dog and he thinks he is a baby. So, just as I put the glass to my lips, Crazy see’s a rabbit in the back yard. He was gone quicker than lightning. I threw my glass down on the table, managing not to spill the good wine and took off after him. I really don’t know what he would have done if he had caught the rabbit but I didn’t want to find out. I finally got him back to where I was sitting. He found a stick in the yard that was about the size of my leg and I have some large legs. He picks it up in his mouth and drags it back to where I was sitting. Then he stops chewing on the stick, gets up cocks his head, ears up and tail down and he’s off again, this time he tries to chase a squirrel up the tree. No animal is safe in my backyard. The squirrels drive him nuts. I think he has taken one too many rides in the car with Queenie. Just last week Queenie came home and announced that she might have scared an old lady that lives down the street. When I asked her why that was, she proceeded to tell me how a squirrel crossed her path while she was driving and she ran it over then preceded with fist pumping and yelling victoriously. The old lady was horrified. There must be some sort of “Kill the Squirrels” type epidemic that runs in my family. My grandmother used to sit on her front porch and shoot the squirrels with a B.B. gun. I don’t know how many she killed but let’s just say we always had plenty of pecans to pick up. The thrill of squirrel killing skipped me. I hate to kill animals except roaches, rats and snakes. Those things have no place in my world. Luckily for me and the roaches, rats and snakes I don’t have a lot around my house. I have those big wood roaches outside and occasionally one will get in the house and even then I can’t smash it, but I can damn sure take aim from about 10 feet back with a can of RAID and kill those things.

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