Thursday, January 31, 2008

Buckle Up!

I never write much about work and I suppose it's because I like what I do and it would be boring for most folks and after 5pm, I leave it at the office. There have been some changes around the office that I just don't think I will ever get used to, so I feel compelled to tell someone about it. Back in November our office moved to a new location. Our new location is centrally located and it is decor looks like a picture out of Southern Living magazine. I have to hand it to my boss; his thinking is that we spend so much time at the office that we should be comfortable. He even went so far as to put in the top of the line toilets. This brings me to my point. I have never sat on a toilet and looked for the seat belts before but I'm looking for some on these. These toilets have the most powerful flush. Here comes the TMI. I have never thought about this before but I suppose we all use the toilet in the same manner. Sit, do your business, wipe, stand and zip then flush. That is exactly how I used to do it. The first time I flushed the toilet, it sounded like a damn jet engine was taking off. It scared me so bad that I jumped back and hit my head against the bathroom door. After I composed myself, I did a second flush to make sure there was nothing wrong with our new potty. It did the same thing. I jumped again but this time was sort of expecting it so I didn't fall into the wall trying to get away from what surely was going to explode. I never did get used to all this noise so I decided to try something new. Now when I use the potty I sit, do my business, wipe but do not get up before I flush. I sit when I flush, and I have to say it is quite an experience. It's almost like a bidet except with air and not water. It's been almost 2 months now and I have still not gotten used to air blowing up my lower orifices. I must admit though, it is a bit refreshing sometimes. There is just nothing like cold gail force winds blowing up your ass.

Monday, January 21, 2008

Happy Birthday To Me!

Happy Birthday to

Happy Birthday to

Happy Birthday Dear

Happy Birthday to Me!

Wednesday, January 16, 2008

A Look Back at 2007

So many things have happened in 2007 and since I started this blog in 2006. I haven’t been writing much because I have felt overwhelmed and then a friend of mine wrote something that inspired me. My friend Mildred started a blog that you will not see on here but it’s a blog just the same. He wrote that he had started a blog and trashed it and started again and trashed it, and then he said he remembered why he started writing blogs in the first place. He was writing for him. This was his therapy. And then it hit me. I started writing blogs for the same reasons. For those bloggies that have taken the time to visit me, you know that I have not written a lot lately. I have felt so overwhelmed that I have become withdrawn from more than the blogger world. I know that it started around the 1st of November and it continued through Christmas. Here it is January 16th and I do feel a bit better but I’m not completely over it. I don’t think the reasons for my withdrawal from the world are important, at least not in this blog. The main thing is that I’m feeling better and am reminded that like Mildred this is for me. In remembering that it becomes easier to write.

I think one of the most important things that happened to me in 2007 was that I made new friends and became closer with some that I already had.

I had 3 relationships in 2007. I continue to see the White Russian and we become closer everyday. I met Mr. Mustang in December of 2006 and on my Birthday January 21st we became more than friends. Although that relationship didn’t last the friendship did. I tried to be a “Lover” to Mr. Italy and it was fun at the time but I know now that a lover is not what I want. We too have remained friends.

Aunt J and I have known each other since our early 20’s. We didn’t really start hanging out till about 5 years ago and in this past year because we are both single we have clung to each other. She has introduced me to some of her friends and I can now call Playboy and HP my friends. Trick, I’m so happy for you and the Old Man. I would rather be grilling naked at home than out drinking and dancing in the bars. I have known Mildred for about 5 years and it’s only in the last year that we have become like sisters, hence the reason for the alias Mildred.

I met Mr. Drama Battalion, The Chicken Lady, Princess and several others that make me feel comfortable enough to share my thoughts, drinks and smiles with.

I still have some of the dearest friends a woman can ask for. Jewels & Hubby, Jo Jo, Trick & The Old Man, Bull and Mully and Jazz Square, I Love You!

I had the pleasure of meeting and sharing drinks and dinner with one of my fellow bloggie buddies. Sugar Daddy, you are a sweetheart. I haven’t met any of the others but for those of you that are on my blog list then you got there for something more than HNT.

I have gotten stronger when it comes to standing up to Asshole.

I have become closer with my children, Queenie in particular.

I have learned that I can’t fix everything. I can lend an ear, a shoulder or even money but I can’t fix it.

I have learned that it’s Ok to ask for help and if I make a mistake, true friends will forgive.

In closing, I have become a stronger woman because of the lessons that I have learned, the friends that I have grown closer to and the new friends that I have made.

Wednesday, January 09, 2008

Pish Posh

I just love saying those words "Pish Posh". I don't know why but I do. What do you think they mean? I think it means "Bull Shit" and so as I try to set a good example for Queenie and GI Joe, I say Pish Posh. A few things that make me say Pish Posh...
  • Queenie doesn't want a RFCU debit card because it says empower on it. WTF??? She had a Regions debit card but it seems they cancelled her card because even though she had money in the bank, it was not available till after 2:00pm. Pish Posh Queenie! Who gives a rat’s ass if the debit card has the word empower on it? Get over it!
  • Asshole got mad because I didn't alert him that Queenie got slugged at a Hockey game. What could he do about it? Nothing? He doesn't even come to the games. I myself didn't realize how bad it was till the next day when her cheek turned black and blue. Side note here a free Jersey really so important that you have to get violent with the girls that are giving them out? Pish Posh for sure!
  • To those people who boycotted "The Golden Compass" I say Pish Posh! Get real, it's just fantasy. Great movie!!!
  • Pish Posh on primary elections. It's cool if all the States held a primary election on the same day but just who says the good folks of New Hampshire know anything more than us good folk down here in the South or anywhere else for that matter. I guess what really urks me is that people want to vote for winners and when New Hampshire has a primary and declares winners then too many people will want to vote for a winner and not really think about what they are doing. Pish Posh for sure!

I really don't have a lot to say here today. I am slowly getting out of my funk. Thank God the holidays are over. Next year I might just skip town that way I don't have to pretend that I'm happy. I didn't succeed in fooling anyone this year.

I couldn't cancel Christmas so there is no use trying to cancel my upcoming big 48, so instead I will embrace it. I'm inviting everyone I know to dinner. Not to worry Trick, I'm not cooking. We will all go out where someone will cook for us.

Pish Posh Everyone!
Hugs and Kisses Too!