Tuesday, January 09, 2007

What is wrong with me???

What is wrong with me? Am I ugly, am I mean, am I boring, am I stupid? I ask myself these quetions because if I am any of these things then it would explain why I'm feeling so low. I have lived in Huntsville all my life and I have but a few friends. Granted, until about 10 years ago I was so painfully shy. Maybe that is why I don't have hundreds of friends. I'm not knocking the friends that I do have because if you are one of the chosen few then you are just that "one of the chosen few" and your frienship is treasured. Why can't I just let anyone in my life? I am friendly to everyone, but only a few knew me inside and out.

I have tickets to the broadway play the producers for Saturday night. They are GREAT tickets, 2nd row, dead center. I would like nothing more than to be romanced. I have some silly fantacy about dinner, conversation and laughs and then going to the play for more laughs. I just don't see that happening. I have asked nearly every friend that I have to find me a date for Saturday night. I guess I feel like that kid who is chosen last when teams are being picked? Do you know what that feels like? I do, and I suppose that is why when it comes to sports that I don't know much about, I will always root for the underdog. Tomorrow night Trick and I are going out to our favorite watering hole to shop for me a date. How sad is that? Sure I could ask a number of my friends to go with me but the truth is, I want to feel like the 1st kid who is chosen to play ball. Wish me luck. If I don't get chosen for Saturday night, my next blog may be drowning with tears :-(

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