Thursday, December 28, 2006

Someone played with my balls!

I hope everyone had a very lovely and Merry Christmas!

It has been a while since I posted. I just haven't felt like doing much of anything. I felt it necessary to give everyone an update on the decorated walker. It worked! Maybe it worked a little to well. The last time I went out (right before Christmas), I went to a department store called "Bed, Bath & Beyond". As soon as I walked in a young man around the age of 30 - 35 ran up to me and emediately started playing with my dangling balls. It caught me off guard to say the least. If that were not enought, he then followed me through the store teasing me in a playful way about my balls and my walker and how it was that I came to be in the shape i'm in. Some (most) of his remarks were way out of line for an employee to be saying to a customer but I am not easily offended and just took it in stride. When I was ready to check out he made it a point to make sure I got in his line. He checked me out and bid me goodbye and urged me to come back again very soon. I called Trick and told her about it and she suggested I make him my new boy toy. He is a bit young for me and way to obnoxious so I say he would be a good candidate for Trick, now that she is single again.
Take Care!

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

Check Out My New Ride!

Now Don't get jealous. I worked very hard to get this. And if any of you out there are feeling sorry for me then you have not seen just what this really is. Last January I had a total hip replacement in my right hip and I liked it so much that tomorrow at 2:30pm I'm getting another racing stripe on my right hip. This sleek piece of equipment is sure to draw the attention of every male I come in sight with. Why you ask? Because I am just to damn young to be going through this. So, I'm just going to make the best out of it. Since it's quite obvious that Mr. Shark is no longer interested in making me Mrs. Shark or at the very least Mrs. Shark of the night, then I plan to flirt with every male I come in contact with. Yep - I'm going to make sure to drop some items in front of them and with me living in the South then I am assured that they will pick said item up for me. Then I'll smile graciously and Thank them. I need to practice that certain smile that Trick says I have. Apparently it's quite flirtatious. I am also going to put some Christmas garland around it. That should surely get someone's attention. And if they don't pay attention to me then I'll be forced to do the unthinkable. I will bring out the cow bell and attach it to my new racer! I looked in the mirror this morning and darn it! I am not ugly, I think I'm even cute at times. Look out Trick I'm on the prowl. I liked Mr. Shark a lot but he is not the only fish in the sea!

Monday, December 11, 2006


  1. Deal with your feelings. Feelings are important because they tell us what we need to feel better. To deal with our feelings, we must name them, tell ourselves it's o.k. to feel them, express them in a safe way, and then decide what we need to do to feel better.
  2. Adjust your attitude. What we tell ourselves about a situation will determine how we feel about it. Telling ourselves about the good side of things, or having a positive attitude, can help us feel better.
  3. Discover your choices. In every situation there are things that we can and cannot change. We help ourselves by choosing something that can be changed and working toward that goal. (Remember, our attitude is something that can always be changed.)
  4. Accept imperfection. No person or thing in this world is perfect. Everyone makes mistakes. We can help ourselves to feel better by reminding ourselves of this, and then by adjusting our attitude or discovering our choices.
  5. Give yourself a break. When we get tired, physically or emotionally, we can help ourselves to get our energy back by relaxing or taking a break from what we are doing. Taking a break helps us to feel better.
  6. Take things one step at a time. Having too much to do or think about can get us feeling overwhelmed. If we stop and pay attention to ourselves, and use patience and gentle words with ourselves, we can feel better.
  7. Treat yourself kindly. When we are angry at ourselves, or push ourselves too hard, it can make us feel worse. If we stop and pay attention to ourselves, and use patience and gentle words with ourselves, we can feel better.
  8. Plan ahead. When we have a lot to do or think about, planning ahead can help prevent problems before they arise. If we plan ahead, we can make sure that we have enough time and energy, and the tools we need to get the job done.
  9. Ask for help. Sometimes, no matter how hard we try, or how many coping skills we use, we still can't solve our problem. That is when it is time to ask for someone else to help us so that things can get better.

Friday, December 08, 2006

Wanted - Battery Operated Christmas Lights!

Well everyone, it's that time of year again. If the Holiday's were not enough, this year will be even more trying for me. Next Thursday I will be having some major surgery. I'm having my right hip totally replaced. I'm not too terribly nervous about this. Last January I had my left hip totally replaced and I did really well. The thing that bothers me most is that I will have to walk around using a walker for about 3 wks. That is so depressing. Not to mention that I can't drive for 3 wks. I am trying to make the best of it though. Now that we are officially in the Christmas season, I think it would be appropriate for me to decorate my granny walker with Christmas garland and lights (if I can find some battery operated lights). I have to draw the line with the bells though. I have to get my tree put up this weekend. I have to finish my Christmas shopping, or maybe it would be more accurate to say "start my Christmas shopping". I have a Birthday party to go to on Sunday afternoon. The White Russian is coming to town on Tuesday, My Mother is coming to town on Wednesday. I'm a bit overwhelmed right now. Let me hear about your problems so I'll quit thinking so much about mine.
Merry Christmas to all!
The Cake Lady!

Thursday, December 07, 2006

The Cake Lady Horoscope

Getting overwhelmed by details? Buckle down and go through them one by one today. Overwhelmed does not begin to describe how I feel. There is not enough hours in the day to go through everything. I'm having major surgery on the 14th. I have to get Christmas for my friends and family taken care of before then. I have to put my tree up. I need to clean out closets so I would have a place to put some of this clutter that has accumulated in the past few months. It's one of those days in which you're better off just sticking to your routines than improvising. Now that's a conflict, it just said to buckle down and go through my details one by one. Now it's telling me to just stick to routine. I have been routinely just piling things in a corner because I don't know where to put them. If someone gets on your case for not being perfect, take a step back to get a fresh perspective. I see no problem here, afterall I am near perfect. If your blood is moving slowly and you feel sluggish, bootstrap yourself straight into exercise. Now I know this is a crock of shit. My blood is definitely moving slow, and it's because I can't take any freaking advil because Advil thins the blood. I can't freaking move fast because I'm near crippled!!! I think I'll just exercise with the 12oz curls tonight. It's been one of those weeks. Aunt J - I'll be calling you later!

Tuesday, December 05, 2006


I've been tagged and have no one to tag back.

Name "6 weird things about you". In the end, you need to choose 6 people to be tagged and list their names. People who get tagged need to write a blog post of their own 6 weird things as well as state this rule clearly. Don't forget to leave a comment that says you are tagged" in their comments and tell them to read your blog.
  1. I love Coors Light Beer and Chocolate Cake or Chocolate Chip Cookies
  2. I have a fetish for socks, I went to New York last week and all I bought myself was a pair of socks with the subway map on them.
  3. I think like a man
  4. I do not use a wash cloth when I bathe, I prefer my hand and a bar of soap.
  5. I like nuts but I do not like them in my food. I like them just by themselves.
  6. When I sleep I like to hang my feet off the end of the bed.

Monday, December 04, 2006

She's gone

I have put off this blog because it's makes me angry that a young, beautiful woman and mother has passed away. God forgive me for being so judgmental. It seems to me that this death could have been avoided. Dear friend, why did you not let someone drive you home? Why did you not put on your safety belt? Why were you driving so fast in the rain? God be with those who are hurting more than me, there are many. When I feel really down and feel like I need to pray and don't know what to say to God, I pray the Lords Prayer. It seems to cover everything, so here goes.

Our Father, who art in heaven,
hallowed be thy name.
Thy Kingdom come,
thy will be done,
on earth as it is in heaven.
Give us this day our daily bread.
And forgive us our trespasses,
as we forgive those who trespass against us.
And lead us not into temptation,
but deliver us from evil.
For thine is the kingdom,
the power and the glory.
for ever and ever.
God be with you!